AuntyB and Grandmama

Toddlers' Sleeping Problems and Not Sleeping

AuntieB: Here’s a situation from one of our readers:

My daughter is 28 months old. Her routine for naps is to eat lunch, use the potty, put on a red sleeping T-shirt and to go down for a two hour hap between 11:45 and noon. Recently, she had gone down for her nap fine, but instead of going to sleep peacefully as usual, she stays awake. She sings, talks, thrashes about the bed and sits up. She has one stuffed “sleep” teddy bear and a knitted blue blanket for covering and holding. Sometimes, she takes thirty minutes to an hour to settle down and sleep. Other times, she stays awake the whole two hour rest time. Once she fell out of bed trying to get over the low rails. What can I do to help her sleeplessness?

Number One: There is a cause. Determine that cause, and then you can address it. Two plus year olds are growing rapidly. Sometimes, our expectations of behavior jump ahead of their actual time and place in space.

You still have a baby turning little girl. Step back a little in time to an earlier period. Begin comfort measures and self-calming techniques to empower your daughter to take control again. She is ultimately responsible for her own self-calming to sleep.

What did you do at one year, one and a half and two years to help her calm down to sleep? Spend every naptime in a row reinstituting these techniques. Be Consistent. Soon she will fall back into the norm of calming down to sleep. Then, she will no longer require your help.

Toddlerhood extends up to three years of age. Expect setbacks. Deal with them and go on. Life is a struggle, especially for a two year old who is trying hard to become independent.

Some causes of sleeplessness:

• A change in routine. This is the number one cause.

Reading With Dad — Reading as a Part of Toddler's Night-time Transition to Sleep

AuntyB: A half or quarter hour, either after supper or before sleep, is a great together time with Dad. Instead of romping and having a boisterous exciting tumble on the floor, use this as a quiet-down time to read.

Dad gets to sit in his easy chair and relax while holding his toddler who is full from supper, tired from the day and in need of a relaxed, loving time before sleep.

Dad's deeper voice quietly reading helps the youngster to nestle down and just to be with his favorite  guy. Quiet talk resulting from the book helps the parent/child relationship to grow. It also reinforces the idea that reading is pleasurable and desirable.

Just writing of it brings a peace to me.

Grandmama: While lots of fun for Dad, the excitement of roughhousing does not tire a child out. It actually keys them up, making it harder for them to get to sleep. Save it for earlier in the day during an active play period.

I don't ever remember our Dad reading to me like that. But, I do, even now, hear his deep, low voice as he sat on the edge of my bed, telling me some of the events of his earlier life.

Never underestimate the power of your interest, Dad, in the life of your toddler. It lasts a lifetime.

Toddler Nap — After Lunch! Time Out for Mom

AuntyB: When you are exhausted out of your mind and your child nestles their little head next to your neck and relaxes into your shoulder very ready to fall asleep, you think: "This is as good as it gets."

A last sigh and a tiny voice says, "Night, night." It is recliner time for Mom. The first ten minutes intro to sleep is critical. A few mumbled words and your toddler begins the descent into rest. That's your time to relax for a few minutes, letting the house come to a quiet standstill. Peace for your baby (now toddler) and peace for you as you let go of the tensions of the day and think, "Yes, we've lived another segment for our life together.

It has been a pleasure for me to sit down and reflect about the unfolding of the morning. I add a page to my daily journal. Will my child one day enjoy reading about her day when she was two years old? Events that she has no recall of except through the words on that page.